Because LIFE takes place within these walls
Oh my friends. I've been so excited to post this one. It's been on my heart for so long.
Today is all about making our houses into homes. And before we start fluffing couch pillows or rearranging mantle decorations, a dive into the innerworkings of our hearts is in order.
Because, obviously.
This is an interesting time in history because for the first time ever, we can get on social media and find out what someone's living room across the country looks like. We can watch someone we've never met on the other side of the country in real time as they build their farmhouse dream home, on land, of course. We have the ability to see EVERYTHING that anyone, anywhere posts online.
Comparison can creep in, yes?
On top of this reality, ALL of these photos are filtered. All of them are arranged just so before the picture is taken so that we only see what is supposed to be seen. Crisp white light is added. Cameras are held in increasingly awkward ways. Shadows are lifted. We have to remind ourselves that many of the things we see online are actually more likened to a movie set...where the room ends at a given point and the innerworkings of the production studio are revealed just slightly to the side of the camera angle. Things are not always what they seem. And while we KNOW this truth, it's hard to remember every day. Truth needs to be repeated in order to sink in and keep our hearts in check.
I say all of this because for the first few years in our home, I'd walk around and feel deep dissatisfaction. I'd wonder why our home wasn't as dreamy as so many other homes I'd experienced, in person and online. I'd feel guilt that my children were sharing a room, that the bathroom didn't have airy, dreamy light filtering in 24/7, that my kitchen utensils weren't "cute" enough, or that my rugs had more dog hair and cheerios on them than they should. (ok, that last one was probably a valid concern).
But I spent a summer doing three things...
I carved out time to intentionally love on my home.
I created spaces that were functional and beautiful.
I began routines that changed the mood and feeling within my home.
And before I knew it, I loved my home. It became the dreamy space I'd always longed for. And we didn't have to move or build a house to do it.
Step One
When I say intentionally loving on my home, what I really mean is that we threw out a bunch of stuff that we didn't need. We overhauled drawers, we rearranged closets, donated things, trashed things and came up with a plan.
Yes it was hard.
Yes it was worth it.
Yes I still have more purging that I need to do.
No I haven't missed anything I got rid of.
And even if I did miss something. It's just "stuff." We've all got to stop placing inappropriate value on our things.
A second part of this intentional love was that I reorganized most of the things that we didn't throw out. I came up with a plan so that things we actually use had a place that was easy to access them. For example, my kids are always drawing and writing stories on blank printer paper. Our printer paper used to be buried in the back of a closet inside a filing cabinet drawer. It drove me nuts how they'd go into that closet like jungle hunters with a machete just to get some paper out. The closet would be destroyed. We moved the printer paper to one of the top drawers in the kitchen...easily accessible for everyone.
I'll put together a post of all the things we did to overhaul our home but for now I'll move to the second thing...we created spaces that were functional and beautiful.
Step Two
I made a list and then created Pinterest boards (<---link to mine) for each new space that I wanted to create inside our home. I then used that inspiration to create a couple of functional AND beautiful spaces inside my home. I've definitely got a follow-up post coming on this because this was a HUGE thing for me. I needed our space to work better for me and my family.
I made a "reasonable" list of ideas for how I wanted our home to serve us instead of us working around the shortcomings. I then sat down with my husband and we hashed it out. Some things I considered reasonable were out of the question for him. This is marriage...and it's ok. This is not to say you need to remodel your home or move. But I guarantee there is potential in each of our homes that we are missing, and when I started finding those hidden places in our home, it became addicting. I wanted to find more ways to use our space in more valuable ways to us.
The big example I'll give is that about a year ago, we wanted to add a playset to our backyard for our growing kids. However, we didn't really have a place to put it without plopping it down in the middle of the grass. My husband loves the grass back there and didn't want it to get ruined. (I know that's not important to everyone, but it was one work-around that we had because it was important that he love the space as well).
But we have lots of mulch areas and groundcover areas in our yard. One of these large areas of mulch held a large outdoor storage unit where we keep our lawn mower, scrap lumber and let's be real here, two large bounce houses.
In one afternoon, we moved the storage shed from a very large and central area of our yard to the opposite side that's more hidden. We ripped up ground cover and set it down in a place that we literally weren't even using before. It felt like we had added 100 square feet to our backyard! I was hooked after this transformation because I saw how we were able to intentionally make a change without any sacrifice at all...except for the one afternoon rolling a storage shed on top of PVC pipes across the yard. Oy!
*Photo 1: playset in the space where the shed used to be, Photo 2: New shed placement, previously unused space with ground cover
I immediately walked inside and started looking around for wall space, corners, closet space, cabinets, even furniture configurations that weren't serving us as well as they could. A few months later, we had a construction crew in our house creating a fourth bedroom out of a formal dining room. So be careful with this.
Step 3
Thirdly I established some daily routines. These routines ensure that things don't get out of control. They provide stability and focus. Overall, they have lowered stress, improved communication and expectations and decreased a bit of the chaos inside of our home.
These routines are completely for me, yet I've seen every person in our family benefit from them.
I thought that implementing these routines was going to be a major burden and a time stealer. However, I've seen the opposite take place. My morning routine now includes starting a load of laundry, opening all of the blinds to let light in the house, turning on a few lamps, emptying the dishwasher (and hand drying the big items to put them away immediately) and making all of the beds. Each of these things either takes minimal time or can be done while I'm also engaging with my kids. So I'm emptying the dishwasher while my slowest breakfast eater is finishing her cereal. I'm making her bed while she's choosing which outfit she'd like. She then puts the final touches on it as she's learning to take on this responsibility. A year ago, I'd have scoffed at squeezing these tasks into our morning. However, I've seen so much peace come over myself and my family as a mood is set. As clutter is cleared. We are freer to just live in our space and not be burdened by a mess.
I created a responsibility chart for the kids too that I'll share in another post (lots of upcoming post spoilers)! It's been life-changing as far as motivating a 6 year old to get everything done before school without 45 reminders. I made it in a fun, interactive way that makes them feel satisfied when they complete a task.
Friends, our homes are such important dwellings. Life takes place within our walls. And for so long, I was spending my time feeling resentful of our space because it wasn't Pinterest and not seeing the true beauty around me. I was overwhelmed by mountains of laundry and unfinished messes in the kitchen. I'd so love to hear how you love your homes. How you've found treasures of functionality and beauty within your walls that you missed initially. And how it feels so very free to let go of material "stuff" that is holding you down and cluttering your space and your mind.